In The Community
In so many ways, hypermasculinity is still overtly present in today’s world. Some aspects of life for women have incrementally changed for the better and many men are actively making an effort to unlearn machista behaviors. But machista attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors have been normalized for so long that both men and women might not even realize they are perpetuating or enabling harmful behaviors.
This happens especially in the Latino community, where machista comments or behaviors are often brushed off in the name of “culture” or tradition, but just because something has been normalized in culture doesn’t mean that we can’t actively work to change the way things are.
Here are the top signs you’re harboring conscious or unconscious machista beliefs that apply to the entire gender spectrum:
You think women and people capable of pregnancy are the only ones responsible for avoiding pregnancy
When an unplanned pregnancy does happen, many still default to blaming the woman for not “taking care of herself.” So if this thought has ever come to you after finding out someone unintentionally became pregnant, think to yourself, why would your mind immediately jump to ascribing responsibility to the pregnant person when it’s two people who share the responsibility?
With so many methods of effective birth control available for all parties, there’s plenty of blame to go around. But better yet, skip the blame and show some empathy. Your energy is better spent extending support for whatever may come next.
You think women shouldn’t curse, be too loud, direct, or basically engage in any behavior that is typically associated with masculinity
Not only does enforce gender roles but is also a big part of another social concept known as “marianismo” which refers to the idea that the female gender is one-dimensional and assigned specific characteristics attributed to femininity.
Both men and women can be brainwashed into believing that women are supposed to be “pure” and always striving towards some non-sensical and unrealistic standard of perfection, but in marianismo, we often see this being carried out by women who then perpetuate this harmful belief in their own children.
You think women are not “respecting” themselves based on the clothes that they choose to wear
By now, we should all know very well that no matter what someone is wearing, they deserve respect because they are human beings, period. And we certainly know that what someone is wearing has nothing to do with the behavior others take or don’t take because of it.
Many still perpetuate the idea that showing skin is immoral or that men won’t be able to control themselves. Not only is this abhorrently untrue, but it also perpetuates victim blaming. Women can wear whatever they want and show as much as they want, getting unwanted stares or comments is NEVER their fault; it is the person who lacks basic human decency, respect, and self-control.
You think it’s wrong for women to have an active sexual life
Women are still very much shamed for having multiple sexual partners, which is the same behavior that men have been praised for since the dawn of time. On top of that, women are shamed from being vocal about their sex lives; again, a concept rooted in both machismo and marianismo, because the reason for it, is that women have a duty to be “pure” or “modest.”
But an active sex life is part of most human lives, and how a person decides to express it is their decision and their decision only. We keep having to repeat this, but it seems like it cannot be said enough; nobody should get to dictate what another person does with their body.
Weaponized Incompetence
Weaponized incompetence is a behavior pattern where one partner pretends to be bad at simple tasks to get out of shared responsibilities. This one is appalling, but so common that it’s hard to be surprised when you see this happening. A mother is expected to be perfect in every way, but fathers always get away with doing the bare minimum, and worse, praised after they successfully do something that requires the bare minimum of competency.
I had to fucking see this now you do too pic.twitter.com/a5vtvXZCz4
— Phoenician Thanker (@christweetsllc) July 16, 2019
Not too long ago, it was very common to see posts on social media where moms would leave their children with their father for some time while they had to do something else (take a shower, go to the gym, etc), and the punchline of the joke was always that the father couldn’t be left alone with the child for too long because the dad is “useless” and can't be alone without making some sort of mess. It also happens in relationships without children, when it comes to house chores.
This machista behavior, AKA “weaponized incompetence,” is done on purpose because if you’re bad at doing something, you likely won’t be asked to do it again. In a relationship, especially in one where there are children involved, this is a disgusting manipulation technique. Men acting like children that need to be taken care of in every way, instead of a partner who is there to help, is very much machismo behavior.
@pickle_plants The #mentalload on women is real #weaponizedincompetence #dobetter #BillboardNXT ♬ original sound - Christina
The societal problem we have with dismantling these behaviors is that they are normalized, even encouraged sometimes. However, this doesn’t mean that people can’t change how they think. Yes, it’s uncomfortable to change a value system, but it’s absolutely possible. As we come to realize the flaws and toxic aspects of our society, we can always choose to unlearn, relearn, and educate ourselves and those around us.
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Mercury will be in retrograde from September 9th to October 2nd, 2022, and that’s the 3rd retrograde this year. Mercury is the planet of communication, commerce, and travel, and we experience a retrograde around three to four times each year. For some, all this means is that Mercury appears to travel backward, but it actually doesn’t.
This is just an optical illusion, but it’s where the descriptor “retrograde” comes from. For those who practice astrology, however, this period of time is believed to impact big parts of our lives.
This phenomenon is a popular topic of conversation on social media, with many commenting that they feel the effects of the retrograde as soon as it starts. But what happens exactly?
Since Mercury governs communication, retrograde is typically associated with confusion or frustration, meaning things might begin to feel like they are heading for chaos. Think laptop stops working right as you have to deliver a final paper. Plans go interrupted. Texts or emails get delayed or mixed up. While this may sound really awful, many astrologers advise not to think about it in a bad way. Chaos is sometimes exactly what is needed to get our lives in order and according to astrologers, that’s exactly what we should be doing.
Retrograde is a good time to sit back and reorganize, and pay close attention to what you're putting your energy towards, and that it’s taking you in the right direction.
Astrologers also warn that relationships can be affected during this period. What this simply means, however, is that effort needs to be made to properly communicate feelings and thoughts. Despite Mercury creating turbulent energy in communications, now is not the time to bottle anything up. It’s time to listen closely to what others have to say and avoid any miscommunications or misunderstandings that can lead to damaged relationships.
The best way to use the knowledge of retrograde is to just be prepared for any worst-case scenarios. Technology may break down out of nowhere (so turn those auto-saves and back-ups on!), and flights, car rides, or other modes of transportation might be missed for random reasons. After all, the big social media meltdown of 2021 was during mercury retrograde.
So plan extra carefully and triple-check everything, now's the time to mind even the tiniest of details. Iva Naskova, an astrologer at the Nebula app says, "Surviving retrograde Mercury is easy if we remember to proofread our emails, texts, and any documentation we might work on." There’s no reason to be miserable during this time; after all, they do happen more than once a year and last almost a month, so instead learn to use it in your favor.Lastly, know that it does affect each zodiac slightly differently so give this guide a quick read to find what you may expect. And last but not least, remember the world is in this together, literally, the effects of mercury retrograde leaves no one behind. So give yourself some grace if you’re feeling extra challenged. Odds are a lot of people you know are feeling the same way.
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The VMA’s have been a staple of pop culture for years now, and there’s always something to talk about after they’re done. This year was no exception, from iconic red carpet moments to first-time appearances to album announcements. And to no one's surprise, Latinx artists showed up and showed out to make the night even more iconic:
In the best Latin category, Anitta made history becoming the first-ever Brazilian artist to take home a VMA. In her emotional acceptance speech, she made sure to point out how it was the first time an artist from her country had won this award, saying, “Tonight I performed a rhythm that, for many years in my country, was considered a crime. I was born and raised in the ghetto of Brazil, and for whoever was born there, we would never [have thought] this was possible. Thank you so much."
@mtv Much love to #Anitta for representing for Brazil ❤️ #VMAs
Her iconic win happened only moments after she performed her hit single “Envolver.”
Anitta Performs "Envolver" | 2022 VMAswww.youtube.com
Later in the night, we witnessed yet another Latinx artist making history when Bad Bunny became the first non-English speaking artist to win the Artist of the Year Award, an award that has for years been one of the most recognized achievements in artists’ careers. Bad Bunny is also now the second Latinx artist to win the award, with the first being Camila Cabello in the 2018 VMAS.
In his heartfelt speech, Benito said, "I always knew that I could become a huge artist without changing my culture, my slang, and my language.”
\u201c*cue the applause* \n\n@sanbenito IS OUR 2022 #VMA ARTIST OF THE YEAR! \u2600\ufe0f\ud83c\udf0a\u2764\ufe0f\u201d— Video Music Awards (@Video Music Awards) 1661743116
Also watch the performance of "Titi me Pregunto" that had everyone getting of their sits:
Bad Bunny Performs "Titi Me Pregunto" | 2022 VMAswww.youtube.com
Definitely, a night to remember for Latinx representation.