In The Community
Femicide is no longer an issue that mostly affects low-income communities or foreign countries, and that hasn’t been the case for over twenty years. A 2002 global study found that among 25 of the highest-income countries in the world, the United States only had 32% of the female population, yet shockingly, accounted for 70% of all female homicides that occurred in those 25 countries. In 2021, the femicide rate in the U.S. was found to be at 2.9 per 100,000 women. It’s also worth noting that the United States lacks an effective way of defining, tracking, and documenting femicide. This lack of an accurate classification in the criminal justice and public health systems is a big hurdle in getting the full scope of the femicide problem in the U.S.
On an expanded global scale, an estimated 47,000 women and girls were killed by intimate partners or family members in 2020 alone. That means one woman or girl is killed somewhere in the world every 11 minutes. In 2021, the Bureau of Justice Statistics showed that the percentage of women murdered by an intimate partner was 5 times higher than for males. Men are also victims of domestic abuse and violence but at a significantly lower rate than women.
Psychological violence is also a significant problem for women, with nearly half of all women (48.5%) in the U.S. experiencing psychological aggression from a partner in their lifetime. The statistics are objectively terrifying. However, the overwhelming majority of women don’t need to know the stats to feel unsafe; they live the stats every day of their lives.
The recent viral conversation of Man vs. Bear is an indicator of how universal the fear of men is among women. The hypothetical question posed by the pop culture account Screenshot HQ has been liked 2.2 million times and has 72 thousand comments.
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When men were asked if they would rather their daughters be stuck in the woods with a man or a bear, many chose the bear as well. Why? Commentators have noted that men are unpredictable and are more likely to be a bigger threat than wild animals. Women are choosing the bears not because they think they would actually survive a bear attack but because men attack women unprovoked and for reasons that are often associated with the mere fact of just being a woman and nothing else.
@thearndtfamily Thats crazy that other men feel like way.. #manorbear #husband #married #fyp
The Dating Hellscape
Dating is an emotional risk for both men and women; that’s clear. For women, however, the safety risk is undeniably greater than for men. In a world where dating has largely shifted into virtual spaces where all you have to go on is a few phrases and some photos, there’s no real way to determine if a man “looks” violent at worst or is a lying manipulator at best.
When Paola Sanchez launched the group “Are We Dating the Same Guy?”, women in the millions flocked to the groups. To date, there are over 200 Facebook groups with over 4 million members worldwide. Sanchez describes the groups as “Red Flag Awareness groups around the world where women can empower each other and keep each other safe from dangerous or toxic men.”
It’s a simple premise that has resulted in significant controversy, especially as stories of leaked posts that led to harassment and even violence from the men who found out about them emerge. There are also emotional and legal issues that some women have had to contend with as a result of their posts.
While the title of the group implies that the focus is on avoiding dating the same guy who is cheating with multiple women, the focus of most conversations is actually on discussing dating experiences. Women use these spaces to share red flags, post men’s dating profiles showing the first name only and photos (doxing is prohibited), and share their stories in hopes of saving other women from bad dating experiences, falling for catfishing and lies, cheating, catching sexually transmitted diseases, or encountering potentially dangerous men. Many women have, indeed, been saved from all of these things, which is why the groups are so popular.
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Ever since the AWDTSG groups entered the scene, many men have actively opposed the groups, claiming they’re toxic spaces where gossip thrives. Some of the claims have led to consequences for men in real life, such as losing relationships, being questioned by employers, and more. They have also led to consequences for women, who have been confronted by men they’ve discussed in the groups. Some have even been sued.
On one hand, critics of the groups have argued that it’s very difficult to verify what every person posts on the AWDTSG groups and that some women may have reasons to fabricate stories. Also, mental health practitioners have noted that a Facebook group likely isn’t the best space to discuss traumatic dating or relationship experiences. On the other hand, there are thousands of testimonials from members of the groups that have said the information they found saved them from unsavory experiences in the dating scene. Women have also reported cutting off men whom they were social friends with after they found out about instances of alleged abuse or misbehavior.
The Legal Battles and Outcomes
One of the men affected by the AWDTSG groups decided to sue. Stewart Lucas Murrey sued over 50 women in California for defamation, alleging sex-based discrimination and civil conspiracy. However, a judge recently dismissed the lawsuit against one of the women, Vanessa Valdez, who filed an anti-SLAPP motion arguing against censorship. Despite Murrey’s claims, the judge found no evidence of conspiracy and ruled in favor of free speech, emphasizing the importance of protecting women's security against harassment. Murrey vowed to continue his legal battle, but legal experts note the difficulty of defamation lawsuits, especially in cases involving online speech.
'Are We Dating The Same Guy' lawsuit press conferencewww.youtube.com
This isn’t the first defamation lawsuit made against women from an AWDTSG group. In Chicago, Nikko D'Ambrosio filed a lawsuit against 27 women over an allegedly defamatory post stating he sent harassing messages to women and was otherwise just a really low-quality and selfish person to date. D'Ambrosio's attorneys argued his reputation was damaged and sought intervention from Facebook and Meta. This lawsuit was eventually dismissed.
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But as reported by “Tech Dirt,” “apparently D’Ambrosio is the kind of guy who won’t take no for an answer… Even from judges. He’s apparently the kind of guy that when his number gets blocked or his case gets thrown out, he’ll just text from a different number or file a brand new case.” D’Ambrosio refiled his case to attempt to relitigate whether his status as a serial ghoster is in fact warranted.
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When an overwhelming amount of women are choosing bear over men in hypothetical woods, and groups like “Are We Dating the Same Guy?” aren’t only racking up the legal wins but also racking up their number of members, it’s a good indication that AWDTSG isn’t going anywhere. If anything, women will likely continue to band together in search of safe spaces, despite the potential risk of leaks, lawsuits, and being confronted by the men they expose.
In a world where women’s claims of harassment or abuse by men are consistently ignored, dismissed, or simply not believed, women are protecting each other, attempting to fulfill the lack of societal protections, and carrying the feminist legacy of consciousness-raising groups.
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Mountain climbing: Cholitas conquering heights
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Cecilia Llusco, an Aymara woman, is one of many Cholitas leading the charge against societal conventions. Raised in Bolivia’s mountains, Llusco’s connection with them runs deep. From her early years assisting her father, a high mountain guide, to going on her own climbing journeys, she’s known for her resilience and determination. She has become a high mountain guide, following in her father’s footsteps while still making the road her own.
The Cholita Climbers
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“The Cholita Climbers,” as they're known, refuse to be bound by traditional gender roles. Scaling Huayna Potosí and setting their sights on Everest, they're not just climbing mountains; they're shattering stereotypes. Lidia Huayllas, the group's elder stateswoman and deputy mayor, is leading by example, inspiring generations of women to pursue their dreams despite the odds. The journey of The Cholita Climbers is not just defined by an impressive list of physical feats, but also by a deep sense of cultural pride.
Skateboarding: Cholitas redefining spaces
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In the streets of Cochabamba, the Imilla Skate collective stands out for all the right reasons. Led by Dani Santiváñez, this group of bold young women is rewriting the script of skateboarding. With their vibrant, traditional clothes, they challenge conventional ideas of femininity and athleticism, presenting a much more interesting and empowering alternative.
The Imilla Skate collective
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The Imilla Skate collective has transformed neglected spaces, making them vibrant and exciting again. They’re not just skaters, they’ve reclaimed their right to public spaces and fostered strong community bonds. Their influence even goes beyond the streets of Cochabamba, rippling across the nation. Their message is clear: women belong in skate parks, and their presence is non-negotiable. By taking this stance, they're helping amplify indigenous voices and reshape perceptions of what it means to be a skateboarder.
Self-defense: Cholitas against gender-based violence
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Faced with the issue of gender-based violence, Bolivian Cholitas are refusing to stay silent any longer. Lidia Mayta, a woman who was violently attacked by would-be robbers at her front door, has turned to martial arts as a tool for empowerment. Not only of herself but of other women in the community who are tired of being victimized and afraid.
In Bolivia, over 53% of women experience physical or sexual violence. Despite the high prevalence of gender-based violence, prevention services often lack knowledge about disabilities, limiting access to information and care, and leaving women to fend for themselves. Shockingly, only 1% of gender-based violence cases are prosecuted and convicted.
Warmi Power taekwondo studio
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In this context, taekwondo studios like Warmi Power offer a sanctuary for women to learn self-defense techniques and reclaim their sense of agency. Beyond physical training, these spaces serve as platforms for solidarity and collective action against gender-based violence. Mayta found this space to learn taekwondo and she’s now one of their main facilitators, dedicated to introducing women to the transformative power of martial arts.
Self-defense techniques
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By teaching women with the skills to defend themselves, organizations like Warmi Power are challenging the culture of impunity and fostering a culture of accountability. Their message is clear: violence against women will not be tolerated, and every woman has the right to feel safe in her community.
Bolivian Cholitas are leading a new chapter in their history
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The stories of Bolivian Cholitas scaling mountains, mastering skateboards, and learning self-defense are not just individual victories; they’re part of a larger change that will ripple for generations to come. Through their actions, these women are rewriting the script of gender norms and reclaiming their rightful place in society. As they continue to challenge stereotypes, they inspire communities in Bolivia and around the world to rise and take up space. Bolivian Cholitas are shaping history, one challenge at a time.
- Las Patronas de La Bestia: A Brief History ›
- The Story Behind Imilla Skate: Bolivia’s ‘Cholita’ Skater Girls ›
- Cholita Mountain Climbers Defy What Climbing Looks Like ›
